I’ve been here in Georgia almost 2 weeks, driving in 30-45 minutes one way each day (depending on traffic; there are a lot more people here than in McDowell County, WV), to be with my mother first in her hospital room, now I drive a longer distance to stay with her in the rehab facility. I spend about 8 hours a day there, when my brother or sister in law comes in late afternoon to also spend a few hours with her; then I go home for supper and what seems a very short evening. My brother held down the fort for nearly a week before I arrived, spending most of every day with Mom. I am glad I can share the burden of the responsibility in this small way.
Of all my siblings, my schedule is most flexible. I have my computer with me which is already set up for work away from the Mustard Seeds and Mountains’ office since I have needed to work from home more to ease my own work stress, and for when I travel every 6 months to California for cancer follow up visits. Technology is our friend (as long as it works! We won’t talk about when it doesn’t…).
Mom was medically able to be released from hospital, but otherwise she was not ready to be at home. She is still very weak and not able to care for her own personal needs so she is in a skilled nursing/rehab facility so she can gain strength and assume taking charge of caring for herself to a greater degree before going home.
The tables have turned. Whereas my mother cared for us many, many years as we grew up, and me especially when I became weak and often unable to do for myself when I was diagnosed with MG, now we, her children must take care of her. We’ve all read articles, heard the talk about, and perhaps know friends who are assuming care for aging parents. Now it has come to us. It is not easy. It is emotionally stretching; I find myself choking back tears if I let myself think about my sweet mom with her gentle ways. It calls for wisdom and strength from God and His provision as well.
Just the other day I realized what a huge opportunity for ministry the people of God have in the area of serving in various ways those who are elderly or those who have elderly parents in need of varying degrees of assistance from someone caring and capable.
Randy and I are even struggling with the very real need for ministry to those who have serious mental and/or drug problems, as we deal with people in WV; there are those who cannot live alone and safely care for themselves; yet for us, we recognize our limitations to take over such responsibility. We need dedicated, caring people who will serve those in such dire circumstances so they do not end up on the street, sinking more and more into destructive lifestyles. It breaks our hearts to see those we care for in such situations. I thank God for every person and group who reaches out in compassion and wisely cares for our more vulnerable members of society. We, as the people of God, should be in the forefront of such good works.
As typically happens for many people, we can be vaguely aware of different types of needs around us, but until one of those needs touches us personally, we may remain uninvolved, even unconcerned because of the press of our own lives. It is easy to forget. But pain and suffering, either our own or of someone we love, is a harsh teacher. It rudely opens our eyes to not only our needs but the reality that there is a world of hurt out there for many, many others.
For instance, I’ve been aware for some time that as our society ages the need for caring assistance for older people is growing; some people find it hard to afford their prescriptions, food or housing. Some get to the point that it is hard for them to stay in their home alone because they just can’t do certain things like they used to do to remain independent, either physically or mentally or both. Many folks just need a helping hand; others need much more extensive care.
As we contemplated my mother’s discharge from hospital, we realized we were not equipped to bring her home and give her the 24 hour care she needs in her present physical condition. We set in motion getting her into a facility where she will get that kind of care until she can come home. We are asking God, all along the way, to guide us, open the right doors and provide for her care. We are praying her insurance will cover the costs. What if it doesn’t? What if she is released before she can get into a skilled nursing facility? What will we do? Who can help us? How can we afford it? We will cope somehow, but see the fears we are facing? Some of you reading this know these fears intimately too, whether with elderly parents or disabled or ill loved ones, or some other need.
I am so thankful for those people who have a gift for seeing needs and doing “something” to meet them, and those of us like me who try. We can all do “something”, which is better than “nothing”. That’s what Randy teaches our teams who come on Mission as Life trips. It is one of our principles of ministry at Mustard Seeds and Mountains. Within our church families we have a ready-made opportunity to make known and our needs as well as extend ourselves to those in need. Knowing our limitations is important; knowing what we are capable of is too.
God uses His people to meet the needs of His world, both within the church and outside it. How well we know that, and are grateful for those who have sensed God leading them to partner with us in various ways as we work among the needy in McDowell County, WV, and for the many, many people who have given us a helping hand in various ways over the years. Being the “hands and feet of Jesus” is a valid concept and goal for those of us who profess to be His followers; in our homes, churches, communities and world. Let us not grow weary in doing good for others, because we will reap our reward at the right time.
With much love and gratitude,
Jacque
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
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